Telephone

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Did you ever play the game ‘telephone’ when you were younger?  That was a favorite of mine.  The game worked best with a large group and the results were usually very comical!  Everyone sat in a circle.  One person started the game by whispering a phrase or story to the person next to them who would repeat what they heard (or what they thought they heard) to the person next to them.  This process would continue until the story got back to the person who originally started the game.  The original story would be revealed as well as the story that had made it’s way around the circle and through many ears and translations.  The two stories never matched and really took on a life of it’s own.  One of the reasons that the story did not remain intact is that people hear what they want to hear.  Perhaps one of the translators was distracted and only heard half of the story and then made up the part they missed.  Perhaps, and this is the reason I tend to place most weight on, people anticipate what the story might be and as their focus is on their own anticipated outcome, they miss the actual information being passed to them.  This game taught many lessons to my group of friends and I:  Don’t believe everything you hear; Gossip can be painful and untrue; Lies spread like wildfire and never end the way you intend…..the lessons that can be drawn from this game are innumerable.

I was thinking about this game today as I heard about a young lady whose feelings were crushed as a result of a conversation that she didn’t hear.  She saw people whispering and immediately imagined that they could only be talking about her.  This propelled her to criticize herself as she pinpointed the root of the imagined conversation.  ‘Her outfit must be out of style, although she had recently purchased it and thought it looked alright when she got dressed this morning.’  ‘She must look ugly today.  She was definitely having a bad hair day so that must be the topic.’  ‘Her work production was down and she is probably about to be called into her bosses’ office for discipline.”  On an on these thoughts ran through her mind until she had worked herself into a migraine and overwhelming sadness.  In reality, her co-workers were talking about a picnic they were planning for the following weekend.  The conversation had absolutely nothing to do with her and yet, she had made herself sick as a result of her runaway imagination.  Has this ever happened to you?  I can raise my hand to admit that I am guilty of presuming myself the topic of secret conversations.  Why do we do this to ourselves?  How silly!  We have enough trouble to deal with that we know about without creating trouble where there is none.  If we would only keep our eyes on Him, we could avoid so much hurt and suffering!

“You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in You, all whose thoughts are fixed on You!  Trust in the Lord always, for the Lord God is the eternal Rock.”  Isaiah 26:3-4 (New Living Translation)

I love this verse!  I am making a concerted effort to keep my focus on Jesus, where my thoughts and focus should be rather than down in the weeds of imagination.  Please join me in this effort.  Leave comments of encouragement or suggestions to help myself and others as we endeavor to keep our eyes on Jesus!

Opportunity

How many opportunities come your way that you miss out on either because you don’t recognize them until it’s too late or because you are too scared to seize the moment?  I was thinking about this very question today.  There have been many times that I have prayed, and prayed for God to show me what He wanted me to do only to hear silence – or so I thought.  Maybe there were answers that I missed because I wasn’t “in tune” with the quiet voice of God.  (I Kings 19:12, “After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.” (NIV))  I was waiting for the earthquake and fire to announce my direction and guidance.  I would have settled for a personal suggestion in an audible voice.  I did not receive any of these revelations or occurences, and so I wallowed in indecision and uncertainty.

I have recently been made aware that the more time I spend in quiet reflection and devotion with God, the clearer His answers become.  There is no mysterious secret to hearing His voice because He speaks to you in the quiet of your heart.  All of the good plans He has for you become like neon signs to your soul as you become close to Him.

Tune in to His voice today!  

Pages and Chapters

Picture Credit: http://www.jaymail.net/2010/08/subject-lines-and-bookstores/

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:” Ecclesiastes 3:1

I love to read!  I read anything and everything – from books, to magazines, to newspapers and even the TV Guide.  Words are just cool.  I like to see how an author strings them together to create thoughts.  I also enjoy the smell of a new book.  There really is nothing else quite like it.  I have heard it said that smell resonates within our brains to associate with a memory and bring it to the front of our mind’s filing system when we encounter the smell.  For instance, the smell of freshly cut grass instantly places me on the Highschool football field in the middle of cheer leading practice.  The sensory capability of our minds is so amazingly designed that it will capture the smell and then link it to the stored memory which then associates vivid and multi-dimensional objects so as to almost physically transport you back to that place and time when you first encountered the smell.  Amazing! This process is not something that a random migration from a frog could ever create.  No!  “I am fearfully and wonderfully made” by God’s design and created in His image.  (This is a topic for another day.  I just had to throw that aside in as God is truly amazing!)

I was in Barnes and Noble the other day trying to pick out the best SAT study guide for my oldest son as he prepares for this monster of a test.  Who knew there where so many different study guides?  I took a moment to breathe in the scent of new books.  So many memories came rushing in as my mind processed this smell.  My earliest association with the freshly published book binding smell are from childhood trips to the library.  We would go, as a family outing each Saturday, to our local library.  We moved frequently due to my father’s many job transfers, so I was able to encounter a variety of different libraries.  We visited very small and very large libraries but they all carried the same smell.  I could have spent the entire day in the aisles of books, and sometimes I did.  There was always a new adventure waiting for me with each new book that I would pull from the shelf.  It was not easy picking the few that I could actually check out and then get to take home to read but I always knew that new books would be waiting for me to discover when I came back the following weekend.  The constant between each trip to the library and each book was the smell of the books.  The paper, binding, print and cover all combined to produce what I have come to associate with literary magic.  As I sat, soaking in the sight and smell of new books, my mind drifted to the free-word connection of chapters.  Chapters of books and chapters of life.  Pages of books and pages of life.

I am about to begin a new chapter in my life and am very excited to see what God has in store for me.  There is something about a really good book that you just can’t put down.  I just finished a book like this.  I literally could not put it down.  I became so immersed in the plot that I became part of what I was reading and lost all track of time.  As I would reach the conclusion of a chapter, I would tell myself, “just one more chapter”.  That didn’t work so well because before I could blink I would reach another chapter and the cycle would continue.  The opposite can be said about a text book or perhaps the SAT study guide.  “Ugh!  Just one more chapter, I can do it.”  The emotional response is completely different between something we enjoy and something we dread.  This response then carries over into so many other areas from memorization ability to sensory connections to actual quality of life.  Just as in the way that I approach reading a page or chapter of a book, so must I approach each encounter of my life.  Each day is a new opportunity from God for blessing and discovery.  My goal this week:  to approach each part of my life with positivity and eagerness!

Hiding Place

“You are my hiding place; You will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance.” 

Psalm 32:7 (NIV)

Picture Credit: http://www.praisephotography.com

From the Inside Out

Picture Credit: http://www.kostaranga.com

Perfectly coiffed hair, matching shoes and handbag, designer clothes, artfully applied makeup, fragrant lotions and perfume……these are all ways to gift wrap the outside to make us look pretty and attractive.  If we appeared on the outside the same as we do on the inside, I bet that the descriptions might be a little different.   More than likely, mine might appear as impatient, unkind, critical of others, hateful, chaotic and harsh.  All of which are the antithesis of the fruits of the Spirit.  I spend a good deal of time hiding these unflattering attributes though so that my presentation only reflects the beauty that I want others to see.  I would be mortified if my inner thoughts were visible to others.  Often I smile while thinking someone is a complete idiot and other times it is impossible to contain all of the unkind thoughts and words that I hold at any given time.  I wish that this were not the case!  I would love to have perfect peace and an infinite amount of patience.  I truly strive to be thoughtful and loving.  My sin nature gets in the way and I allow my self-importance and personal desires to take precedence over those things that count for eternity.

“For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.”  I Samuel 16:7 (ESV).  

No matter how I try to hide the things that I don’t want anyone else to see or know, there is One who see it all.  “Lord, please guard my mouth, my heart and my thoughts.  Make me a vessel that You can use!”

Spa Day

This post makes me a little bit sad and I think you will be sad as well once you have heard this story.  After waiting as long as I could, trust me when I say it was long and overdue, I ventured into my favorite local nail salon this morning. I have been getting manicures and pedicures on occasion for many years and have frequented several different locations, so I feel qualified to say that this salon really ranks with the best.  They are clean, professional, quiet and, based on all of  my experiences, very nice.  That being said, if you have ever visited a nail salon, you know the ethnicity of most of the technicians is Vietnamese.  English is usually not their first language.  Seinfeld had a roaring success of an episode based on the language barrier and the rapid fire conversation that takes place between the workers in their native language followed by the halting English spoken to one of the characters of the show.  That episode is very true to life.  Sometimes, if you close your eyes, you can almost transport yourself to Saigon as the ambience and sounds are so cultural.  I feel fortunate to have grown up in my generation where segregation and racism is not as much of an issue as my parent’s generation faced.  That is not to say that racism  is not something that still needs to be addressed, but from my perspective I don’t see race as a defining trait but rather a part of someone that is unique and interesting.  This will be important in a minute.

Today was busy at the nail salon.  Every nail station and pedicure chair was full and technicians were working with multiple clients.  Next to a dentist, I can’t think of many other jobs that I would not want to perform.  Washing feet for a living just does not sound like fun.  The ladies who work at the salon, though, are always cheerful, joyful and diligent.  These are hard workers!  They typically open at 9am, after driving an hour in traffic, work through lunch and stay until 9pm or later only to drive back home and take care of their families.  The pay is not fantastic and from my observations, tips are not that great either. I like to people watch so having to wait is not a frustrating thing for me to do if my feet are soaking in hot, soapy water and I am sitting in a chair that massages my back.  As a matter of fact, this is one of the main reasons I go to the salon.  There is nothing like this experience and I always hope for a delay to extend my stay.  This morning, I had a coffee in one hand and a magazine in the other while I enjoyed some quiet time, interrupted only by sincere apologies from my manicurist for being too slow.  Despite my reassurances, she persisted in begging forgiveness.  It was not long after this encounter, that one of the owners walked up and thanked me for being so nice to his sister.  I had never talked to him before and really was not sure what he was talking about in the first place.  Then he continued speaking and I am quite certain that I will not soon forget his words.  He said that his family escaped from Vietnam when they were little and children were being taken from their homes during the days of the Vietnam conflict.  He has not seen his parents since that time.  They came to America, where they lived in a community and managed to take care of each other.  They could not attend school as they did not speak English but rather worked to support their “village”.   They are able to learn English now as their children attend school and come home to share their education with the adults.  He said that most people do not have patience and are either mean or rude to them about the language barrier.  He said that often his sister cries because women are so hateful to her.  He then said that she always remembers me because I have been nice to her and take time to ask about her and her family.  Wow!  I was not expecting this type of conversation this morning or really, anytime.  I am ashamed to say that I am not always patient or nice and immediately wondered how many people I might have hurt in the past on account of my frustration or irritation because a conversation did not go the way I anticipated it should.  It’s so easy to have an entitled feeling.  I am not sure why as I am certainly no better than any other person that I may encounter.  This applies to shoppers in the grocery, other patrons at the DMV or even to family members.  God is no respecter of persons.  Matthew 23:11, and subsequently all the other 3 Gospels, states that “if we want to be first, then we must be servants to all.”  This is pretty self-explanatory language.  I have no right to esteem myself higher than any other person and actually am not acting as a Christian if I am not serving others.  This does not translate to literally mopping floors as a slave but rather the motives and actions of my heart toward others.

I felt my heart break a little this morning thinking of how difficult it must be to come to a place where you know no one, speak not the local language and further receive treatment that is hostile and unwarranted when you are literally washing the feet of those who are so mean.  Sound familiar?  Yup, to me also.  Jesus felt this way on my account.  He teaches me lessons all the time in ways that make it ever apparent to my finite mind how much He loves me.  How can I not be a reflection of Him to others I encounter.  This is my daily prayer, “Lord, make me like you!”  Today I also added a prayer for my “nail girl” and asked God to help me continue to share His love with her.

Picture Credit: http://www.nail-course.org

Wicked Words

 

 

 

My husband has created a visual paradise in our back yard.  He has a green thumb and the ability to execute his vision perfectly.  The result is a scenic and relaxing area that the entire family can enjoy.  I walked outside this morning though and noticed that there was something not quite right about the area that usually greets me.  After a minute of soaking in the total scene, I was able to zero in on the conflict that was disturbing the usual flow.  There was a scattering and an additional lump of white wood shavings on the deck surrounding one of our Adirondack chairs.  This was perplexing and irritating.  Irritating because I not only had to clean the area but the chair would now forever be marred and would bear the reminder of this incident.  Perplexing because I could not imagine what caused this to occur.  We have been dealing with a woodpecker who likes to peck the metal at the opening of our fireplace.  This has been comical because I like to sew in the room that has the fireplace.  When the sewing machine is engaged, the sound emanating from the engine creates a noise that the woodpecker must assimilate and connect to another woodpecker.  This causes some frantic and staccato sounds while the bird tries to communicate.  Meanwhile, my chocolate lab gets excited and starts to whine in her efforts to communicate.  It really is quite humorous.  But this matter of the deck chair was not as funny.  When my husband came home from work, he looked at the markings on the chair and determined it to be a chipmunk’s handiwork.  He cleaned the area and sprayed something that would deter the animal from his effort at remodeling our furniture and hopefully will put an end to this damage.  Preventative but not reversible.

 

This got me thinking.  One of my favorite books in the Bible is James.  The author writes in such a way that is straight forward and easy to understand.  There is no mincing of words.  The message is not easily misunderstood:  Words are not to be used casually and without consideration.  They are like missiles that are aimed at a target.  There is not much that can be done to take them back once you have released them and the damage from contact is immediate and long lasting.  I have a short temper and a quick fuse, inherent to my red hair gene.  At least that is where I comically place the blame.  Internally, I know this is a character defect.  The problem with a quick fuse and an open mouth is that words fly like bullets, hitting their mark and wreaking havoc before rationalization and calmness can overtake the initial onslaught of destruction.   I find myself in this battle zone frequently.  This is an area of correction that I need to work toward perfecting but that I am sure will take a lifetime to accomplish.  These thoughts were running through my mind as I considered the white paint flecks and damaged wood on our deck.  It seemed to be a metaphorical message aimed straight to my heart.  Each swipe of the chipmunk’s teeth into the chair, left a mar that would require some reconstruction by a carpenter.  One bite would have been close to unnoticeable, but the amount of marks left on our chair are very evident and had taken some time for the chipmunk to create.  The parallel life message is that one errant, unkind word said in a moment of unguardedness or anger leaves a mar on the inside of someone’s heart.  The damage on the outside may not be as evident.  If these words continue, however, they will quickly create a downtrodden and hurt person whose wounded spirit becomes evident to all.  It has been said that “you only hurt the ones you love”.  That may be true but it should not happen.  Why are we nicer to those we don’t know?  Why can we filter our mouths around colleagues but not our family?  This is not the behavior that Christians are called to exhibit.  No, completely the opposite, as a matter of fact, should be the actions of someone who has experienced ultimate forgiveness.   We are called to a higher standard for we are the words, actions and representative of Christ on earth.  How will others know Him if we profess to be Christians, yet live worse than someone who has never darkened the door of a church.  The good news for those we have hurt with our unkind or hateful words is that there is a Carpenter who can reconstruct and heal a broken heart or wounded spirit.  The best option is to avoid the need for reconstructive surgery by remaining strong in our walk with the Lord and allowing Him to season the words we speak.

 

My goal:  keep my mouth shut if I have nothing good to say AND think carefully before I release my bullets of words.  There is no friendly fire when words are the weapons.  Please leave feedback or suggestions that have helped you to be cautious when you speak. 

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Eyes That See

One thing that has become very obvious to me, even though I am fighting it to the end, is that my eyes just can’t see well anymore.  It started with a gradual loss of distance sight and now I have to squint to see without my glasses, and I hate my glasses.  I feel old, they are uncomfortable and give me a headache.  I can find a good dozen reasons why I don’t want to wear them but the reality is that I need them and without them I cannot see.

If only it was as evident to me when I am blind in my spiritual eyesight.  This happens when I don’t use the “glasses” of God’s Word to assist my sight.  It is so obvious to me on the days that I fail to arm myself with my Spiritual glasses, albeit in hindsight, that I flounder and spend most of those days getting not much accomplished, lacking joy and generally feeling defeated.  Usually it is a result of my laziness.  I want to sleep longer so I tell myself that I will make up this missed time with God at my first opportunity and, like a broken record that repeats the same section when the crack hits the needle, I play this scenario out again and again without learning my lesson.  When I make time for God, the time that I miss out on sleep or computer time is given back to me with a double helping of additional free time to do other things that give me pleasure and enjoyment.  Tasks get accomplished faster, traffic moves freely and, in general, everything just flows much smoother.  This is God’s promise to me. “Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes and clever in their own sight!”, Isaiah 38:3 (NASB).  My day is destined to fail if I try to see with my own eyes.  The wisdom that I need to prosper and find favor only comes from the Source of sight!  My endeavor is to allow God to open my eyes and let me not use my own sight each morning.

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Steps

Psalm 37:23

The Lord makes firm the steps of the one who delights in Him.

Who doesn’t love a good shoe!

Every woman has a journey that begins with a step.  Some days it’s one step forward and two steps back but each step takes us closer to the purpose God has intended for our lives.  I have noticed that each one of my steps also brings me to a newer sense of realization that I am learning so much as I move forward.  All I need to do is look back over my past footprints to see the success stories and triumphs that way overshadow my mistakes and failures.

I want to use this site as a way to reach other women and share ideas, thoughts, helpful hints, questions and solutions.  Some of my triumphs have been so small that they are almost not worth mentioning, but they make me smile.  For instance, I discovered that if I heat the cream for my coffee before I add to my cup, the flavor is so much better and I get to drink a nice, hot cup for a longer time which makes my entire morning so enjoyable!  It’s these little things that encourage me and make me stronger and better.  Hence, the “better today” moniker.  The things that make us better do make us stronger.  I believe that God has ordered my footsteps in such a way that I will come across, usually stumble over, a solution to a problem or an easier way to do something at just the time I need it.  He is great that way!  This keeps me from becoming egotistical and self-reliant.  I know that all good things come from Him who knows just what I need and when I need it.

I hope the things you read here are helpful and meaningful.  Enjoy!

Tuesday Traffic

You would think that Tuesday traffic would be better than Monday traffic, but you would be wrong.  My take on this theory is that drivers save their Monday frustration for Tuesday in hopes that other drivers used their road rage on Monday thus giving them the home court advantage.  Whatever the reason, Tuesday traffic is like the terrible twos.  It’s loud, annoying and frustrating.  There is some good take away from this unavoidable time slot though and for me it is the “me” time.  I have almost uninterrupted time to pick my own radio stations or to, my kids would be mortified, just listen to silence.  This morning I was distracted and ended up sitting through the same traffic light for two cycles so it gave me time to observe the pedestrians and other drivers adjacent to me.  Maybe fate orchestrated this opportunity.  I recognized my own irritation mirrored in the expression of most of the people I saw but I caught the eye of one particular man on a bicycle.  He was not like me.  His clothes were dirty, his hair uncombed, greasy and long.  He looked tired and sad and completely like someone that I would not want to sit next for any extended period of time.  This was a complete chance encounter and I doubt I will ever see him again but I believe that God allowed this scene to act out in front of me.  The radio was playing Casting Crowns and I happened to catch the lyrics to this new and unfamiliar song just at this moment.  “No one knows what we’re for only against when we judge the wounded.”  In that quick space of time, I felt as if God had singled me out to tell me that I was not like Him.  It was a needed reminder that I am no better than anyone else and have no more rights than anyone else.  I need to be reaching out instead of closing myself off.  I see a lot of smiling Christians in church but, yet, the same Christians shield their eyes and guard their hearts in a different setting.  I am ashamed to say that I frequently do the same.  My intentions are always to be reaching out but I typically fall short of those goals and stay to myself instead.

As I continue on my journey to “know” Jesus, it occurs to me that the best way to know Him is to be a friend to sinners in the same way He was – and they are everyone.  “For all have sinned and come short of the Glory of God,” Romans 3:23.

This was my Tuesday traffic adventure.  Share yours!